If you want to reprogram your brain, this is how you write the “code.”
We all have those nagging, doubting thoughts that sometimes come up when you are trying to do something meaningful.
- You can’t do that, you aren’t x enough…
- I’ll never be the kind of person who can just…
- The world just doesn’t work that way…
- I shouldn’t…
These aren’t just simple thoughts. They are powerful reality-shaping thoughts.
This is for the simple reason that every bit of data that we might have about that external world comes to us (necessarily) filtered through our senses. How would you get to it without eyes, ears, nose, etc? But not just those because the central nervous system then interprets that data.
So we don’t have direct access to the external world.
Instead, we have an interpretation of our sense data about the external world. This explains how two people can see the same movie, and for one it was the most groundbreaking film and for the other, it was a total snooze. We each have a unique interpretation of the world around us.
Like your mom always told you, you are one-of-a-kind. This presents both a challenge and an opportunity.
The challenge is that it can be very easy to mistake our perception of the world, for the actual world. When we believe something about the way the world works, in a very real way, that becomes the way the world works for us. There are several well-documented cognitive biases that show this, such as confirmation bias, and attentional bias.
The opportunity that this presents is that if you change the way you look at the world, then you change the world you see. This is where the life-changing art of personal affirmations or mantras come in. Stick with me here!
How It Works
It can seem very irrational that repeating phrases over and over to yourself will change the world that you see around you. I get it. I, for one, am very resistant to so-called magical thinking. It just rubs me the wrong way. However, I am a firm believer in the power of personal mantras, so what gives?
While there are several different ways to do the practice of mantras (some of which I’ll explain below), there are three primary (non-magical) principles that enable their functionality.
1. Wire up new connections
First, while you are repeating mantras, you aren’t doing spell work and summoning the world that you want to see. You are building neural networks. These networks become more and more readily accessible. Just like practicing a certain grip when climbing or a chord in music, the phrases become more easy to access and apply in any situation.
In other words, the more you think the thought, the more habitual the thought becomes.
This is useful because the more frequently you reach for the new thought, the more frequently you access that inner resource. In other words, you are practicing saying positive things to yourself, which puts you in a more positive frame of mind.
2. De-prioritize old connections
This is the reverse of the above principle. As you already know, it’s not that useful to say negative, or self-defeating things to yourself. Frequently, the only thing that makes the difference between whether you successfully complete something is whether you told yourself you could.
It’s just like the famous Henry Ford quote: “Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t, you’re right.”
By practicing personal mantras, you ingrain new positive thinking habits, that will override the old destructive ones.
3. Believing is seeing
This is the part that gets affirmations the magical–thinking rap.
What you’ll notice when you start to practice personal mantras is that as you start to repeat the phrase in your mind, your brain (ever-obliging pattern recognizer that it is) will start to find examples of times when the new thought is true.
It’s not magic, it’s psychology.
It might happen slowly at first, but you will start to have glimpses of the time when you were that confident person, when you did have the best idea in the room, when others recognized you for your competence. When you start to notice this happening, it’s really cool.
The more you practice with your phrase of preference, the more examples you will find to confirm your new thought pattern, and the more you will come to believe the truth of it. Just like going to the gym, it’s simple, but not easy…
The quick and dirty guide to personal mantras
Step One:
Identify a limiting belief that is holding you back in your life. If you have trouble identifying one, you can start by asking yourself what is holding you back from achieving a goal that you have. That thought is likely to be a limiting belief (even if it’s “true”).
Example: “I’m not skilled enough to take on a new project on my own.”
Step Two:
Find another, more resourceful thought you could replace that belief with. It helps if you start with something that you already believe is true (maybe not all the time), or that you can imagine yourself believing in the future. Make sure that it is about the same topic as the belief from step one.
Example: “I develop new skills and confidence when taking on a project of my own.”
Step Three:
Practice your new thought. This is like going to the gym. Just like you can’t just choose an exercise regimen and then sit on your couch watching Game of Thrones and get fit, you can’t just decide on a new belief and have it magically installed. You have to practice it.
I have a necklace that some cultures use for prayer, with 108 beads. (You can get them from any store that sells Tibetan or Buddhist merchandise, here’s an example). 108 is a solid amount of repetitions. I usually take them with me on a walk and repeat my mantra one to two times through the entire strand (there is a tassel to signal the start/stop, so I don’t have to count).
As you practice, remember that you are shaping your neurons 
️ , so try to stay mindful. Think of situations or times in your life, when that phrase has been true. Your brain will come up with examples automatically as you practice, but seeking examples can speed up the process.
Step Four:
Do it regularly! Just like going to the gym, when you first start the new thought it will take extra repetitions to build the “muscle” but once you have been going regularly, you can reduce to a maintenance regimen.
I like to shoot for 2-10 thousand repetitions of a given mantra. That might sound like a lot, but if you do two cycles a day, it only takes about 6 weeks for 10,000 repetitions. Remember progress is incremental, so you will start to notice the benefits long before the 10k mark. You can taper down as you begin to notice your new thought is predominant.
Mantras aren’t magic! They are simple, practical psychology. Find time to practice and watch as your beliefs begin to transform.
